Respect and Disrespect
Ways Children say that Adults Do to Disrespect Them
- Break promises.
- Yell at them.
- Not have enough time for them.
- Punish them for something they did not do.
- Nag.
- Not say thank you when you always tell them to it.
- Interrupt them when they are talking or working.
- Not treating everyone equally. Having favorites.
- Tell them how to do something they already know how to do.
- Speak harshly.
- Forget to hug them when you know they need one.
- Give them the feeling their ideas are not important.
- Being rough.
- Grabbing them.
- Being too busy to listen.
- Being inconsistent.
- Bossing them.
- Taking them for granted.
- Not praising them when they do something good.
- Yelling at them when they already know they are wrong.
- Insulting or correcting them in front of others.
- Misunderstanding them.
- Not taking the time to understand what they are trying to say.
- Lecturing them.
- Acting like they are invisible.
- Not caring about what they care about.
Ways Children say that Adults Do to Respect Them Talks to them.
- Notices them and says, "Hi!."
- Talks to them.
- Calls them by name, not “Hey, you.”
- Answers their questions.
- Cares for them.
- Talks to them respectfully, doesn't put them down and doesn't use sarcasm.
- Helps them when they need help.
What does this mean?
The teacher must create a rapport with students that is one of mutual respect. If this happens is can often compensate for some dislikes students have for learning in some areas. If there isn't a positive rapport, then learning will be significantly reduced or for some it won’t occur at all. If the relationships is such that the student and teacher don’t like each other, or even despise each other, then it is likely there will be no learning at all.
Conclusion is teachers must learn how to discover their student's world. Their culture, their likes and dislikes and work every day to show how learning and education can become an important part of their world.
Suggestions to show respect to students
- Listen like you want to
- Use sufficient wait-time
- Calling on everyone in the room equitably
- Allow students to pass (provide an option for students to opt-out when they don’t know, didn’t hear the question, need more time, are dealing with other thing that are ...)
- Organize questions to help learn (scaffold, prompt, foreshadow, ...)
- Have high expectations and include questions that require more thought
- Provide help
- Give feedback and feed forward
- Don't let students waste time when they are wrong or moving in an unproductive direction
- Use specific praise (reasons why ... )
- Accept student's feelings
- Talk to each student personally each day
- Be courteous
- Showing personal interest
- Celebrate successes
- Touch students (appropriately)
- Ignore when possible (not calling attention to every misbehavior)
- Encourage students to be real (honest and believable)